Over and Out

Well, it's official. This blog is done. I need to save all the entries to a disk or something, 'cause this chapter of my life is over. It's been great being single and out of my parents' house. I've thoroughly enjoyed my roommates - although, to be honest, there're one or two I wouldn't wish to live with again. I've enjoyed, for the most part, traveling back and forth across the country. Okay, actually, I hate it. I mean, I love traveling, but MOVING my LIFE across the world and then back and forth and back and forth across the country a ridiculous number of times in a very short matter of years is extremely annoying. But really, I've been blessed to see some places I wouldn't have been able to otherwise; and do things, particularly various jobs that would've been undesirable with a husband. And that's all behind me now. One awesome chapter of my life is closing ever more rapidly on me.

And yet, married life, along with it's inevitable hardships, is getting ever more intriguing. Although I will always have Mike with me (Heaven willing) I'm not feeling any sadness over my "loss of freedom." In fact, when I think about it, I feel like I'll just be able to do more, because I won't ever have to do it alone if I don't want. Climbing mountains, riding rollercoasters, and jumping out of planes will all be easier, because I'll have Mike there to talk me through my fear of heights. (Okay, not jumping out of planes. I wouldn't get your hopes up, Mike.)

DON'T think for one second though that I'm done blogging. Although I've talked about starting up another blog for Mike and I, I simply haven't got around to it. Give me a break! I'm in the middle of the woods with shoddy internet capabilities. Mike, on the other hand, took the initiative and started it up for us. He even made the first entry. Go to www.mikeandmal.blogspot.com and give it a look. I think we've got potential.

This is Major Mal, over and out. ;)

One Quick Story

I know I've been neglecting my blogging duties in an entirely inexcusable fashion, BUT, I have a vast array of excuses:

-The internet connection here at Jordan Pond Dorm is embarrassingly slow.
-I feel bad for not putting up pictures because of said slow connection, and so I figure, I just shouldn't post at all.
-This is my personal blog, and I'm considering getting a new one so Mike and I can have one together, so there's "no point" in posting until then.

So anyway... I just wanted to tell one quick story of how I almost made a Muslim sin. Here at the dorm I am the janitor and the dinner-watch and Saturday cook. (Dinner-watch, which is a word I made up, in case you didn't know, involves me watching the dinner and cleaning up the kitchen after Carla, the regular cook, leaves.) So I'm watching dinner one night, and we have the Turks that just moved in - two girls and a boy. Of course, they're Muslim, and so when they saw meat was on the menu they asked if there was any pork, so they could avoid eating it. One of the girls reads and speaks English pretty well, so she was translating for her friend, but her boyfriend hadn't come in yet. When he did, they were already sitting down. He asked if there was pork.

"No, it's riblets, they're made of beef," I told him, assuming they were, even though I didn't make them and I hadn't read the menu on the white board.

"Oh, okay, thank you," he said as he dipped into the real meat, rather than the vegetarian option like his countrymen. (Or women, whatever.) About 30 seconds later she brought him up there, a little bit frantic, and asked again, what they were.

"Beef," said I.
"No!" said she. "They are made of pork! It says on the board!"
I leaned over the side, looked stupidly at the board, and said sheepishly, "Oh, sorry. I didn't make it. I just assumed that's what they were made of."

Yeah, I'm a dolt. I get it.

Winter 08 is OVER!!

It's a beautiful thing when the semester comes to a close, even if it means that no one but a select few are staying for the week-long break.

Rexburg is a ghost town during breaks.

But we breakers have so much fun! Saturday night a bunch of us went to the cheap theater to watch Be Kind, Rewind and then we came home and Kyle had just bought I Am Legend so we watched that on Jeremy's big-screen. Yesterday we planned a big pot-luck for lunch after church, and actually got a good-sized group there, although Rita and I were the only girls. (Not that it matters much to me, but I think some of the guys were a little disappointed that half the female population was engaged.) Then Mike and I went to his sister's in-laws for dinner. It was amazing - she makes very good rolls.

Today, I'm going with Mike to work at the youth ranch for substance abusers in Idaho Falls. After that we're going straight to Pocatello to check out some lava hot springs. (The ones near Rexburg aren't lava, and they're not very well taken care of, so they've gotten a little ghetto.) Then, Bishop Walker has invited all of the members of his ward that are staying over for dinner tonight, so we're gonna hit that up. I'm excited! They put on some great barbeques, and he has an amazing back yard, with a two-hoop court, a trampoline, and a volleyball net.

Yeah, us breakers get pretty special treatment. We can park wherever we want in the lots. We can shop in the stores without getting mauled by urgent mothers who only have a week to get everything their precious babes could ever want. We can loop the roundabouts as many times as we want, and most cops don't care - not that they do when everyone else is here, but still. Yeah, it's a pretty special life.

Updates: Mike and I are finishing up the announcements, not that they need to be sent out any time soon, but we're almost done with them. Oh, and Sox-Yankees = 8-5, respectively of course.

The True Story of How I Met Diah

Theah is a man I used to know
who kept his house behind my own;
a simple shack and nuthin' moah,
with a chimney stack 'n' wooden doah.
He wahs rahly seen by any eye
but my friends all said he wahs a scaary guy.

I'll tell ya o' the only chance
I met him - wahs by happenstance:
I's walkin' through the woods alone
'n' singin' in a gahlish tone,
when of a sudden I turned a bend
'n' theah he wahs on the othah end!
Well I jus' stood and staa'ed wide-eyed;
but he jus' smiled 'n' then replii'ed,
"Well, hello theah, deah. How you doo'in'?"
I mumbled somethin' 'bout needin' t' be goin'.

I booked it home like the woods was on fiah.
That's the fahst 'n' last I sahw o' Diah.

This poem was written as a creative piece for Bro. Babcock's British Literature class on March 29, 2008. It demonstrates the Romantic era characteristic of local color.

Card Catalogue - #1

For my Young Adult Lit. class we're supposed to read 30 young adult books, and keep a card catalogue. Since there is so much interest in books amongst my blogging friends and relatives, I decided I would include the card catalogue on here. I know you're all adults, but some of these books I think everyone should read and would thoroughly enjoy. Also, at least in Mum's situation, trying to have a good repetoir of book titles ready for Kait is a task the whole family needs to be a part of. (I'm sure she can find them at the library, but don't let her read The Looking Glass Wars because it's coming to her sometime soon here.)

Slumming - By Kristen D. Randle

Sam, Nikki, and Alicia, the only three LDS seniors in their high school, decide to take on a "human experiment" as a way to make a difference in their last few weeks in school. They each choose one person to help "release" their inner glory, and then in three weeks they'll take them to prom. They soon realize their "lost souls" hold much more in store than the friends ever imagined. The stresses of their projects begin to take a toll on their own friendship, but the three do learn much about who they are and what they are capable of. They find within themselves new depths of understanding, bravery, and trust. (Kristen D. Randle is an LDS author, but don't worry, the book doesn't suck.) 

Other books by Kristen D. Randle: The Only Alien on the Planet, Breaking Rank, On the side of the angels, and Why Did Grandma Have to Die?

Incantation - By Alice Hoffman

Estrella de Madrigal is a young woman living in Spain when the Spanish Inquisition breaks into her small village. In the beginning, she thought she was only a spectator - simply looking on and pitying the misfortune of those who were so deeply affected by the horrible decree of King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella. Suddenly, Estrella discovers secrets about her family and their past that will change her life forever.

Other books by Alice Hoffman: Green Angel, Aquamarine, Skylight, Confessions, and Practical Magic

The Looking Glass Wars - By Frank Beddor   

Alice Liddle's tales of Wonderland and the queendom she is meant to rule are just too far-fetched to believe. Finally, she finds a man who is willing to listen - Reverend Charles Dodgeson, who becomes youn Alice's friend. He tells her he will write her stories down in a book, and it will be their story. Alice is so excited to have finally found someone to believe her. Her heart is broken when she realizes it's not her story at all, but a twisted, bizarre fairytale for children. 

Follow Alyss Heart as she is rushed out of Wonderland into the world of Earth. Here she must trive to remember her true self and the throne that is rightfully hers, until she can find a way to return and overthrow her evil aunt, Queen Redd. (It's the first book in the series. I haven't read the other two yet, but this book was SO MUCH FUN! I loved it! I'm not sure that the last book has been published, I can't find the title. If anyone knows, let me in on that secret!)

The cult-like following of The Looking Glass Wars: Seeing Redd (book 2), Hatter M. (a limited comic book series), Princess Alyss of Wonderland. Also visit www.lookingglasswars.com. It's pretty crazy. People love this book.

The Moves Make the Man - By Bruce Brooks

Jerome Foxworthy - aka: Jayfox, is tough enough to take anything, just as long as he can play basketball. But when the schools decide to integrate, and Jerome is the one and only black kid in his high school, playing ball is no longer an option. He has no friends, no fun, and no team to work with. Until he meets Bix Rivers that is. No two friends were more different, but their differences allow Jerome to help his new-found friend through the toughest times of high school. **NEWBERY HONOR BOOK**

More by Bruce Brooks: Boys Will Be

An Engaging Story - Read Film Noir Style

It was a warm Tuesday afternoon when I walked into my apartment. It was dark, too dark. I walked to the back of the apartment and to the half-closed door of my room. I cautiously pushed the door ajar, and there, on my bedroom floor, were balloons. Pink and white, everywhere. (Except you can't tell that they're pink and white, 'cause you obviously see in black and white right now.) On a chair, pulled into the middle of the room, is a sealed manila envelope. I tear open the seal and pull out the contents: candid photographs of a handsome culprit, a disc, and a list of instructions. I popped the disc in and found a transmission from Agent A to me. I was to find one Michael Watkins, who was armed and extremely dangerous.

This should be interesting.

I prepared for the mission I had been given. The list of instructions told me to be dressed sharply, so I put on a white skirt, red top, and red stiletto heels - some say they're not practical, but they've never had to stab anyone with a heel before. I didn't know what to expect.

At precisely the given time, I left to the given place and found in the cabinet a clue! I pulled the bridal magazine from the shelf and red the next clue, "Go to apartment 209. There you will find a Vinni and a Fingers." I left immediately. I had heard of Vinni and his hitman Fingers before. They were not to be left waiting. 

I walked into the darkened apartment, and there they were, sitting at a table playing cards oh so cooly. 

"We've been expecting you."

"Sorry. Traffic kept me."

"Fingahs, show the lady some manners. Vacate your seat."

"Sorry, Bwoss." 

"Please, Miss, take a seat."

I sat in Finger's place, after being thoroughly checked with a tongue depressor. Vinnie and I chatted for a while, and played a quick game of blackjack - Vinnie loves cards, it's a good way to win him over. After we were done with the pleasantries, we got down to business. 

"We have an informant who you might be interested in listening to," said Vinnie, pronouncing every syllable. They handed me a rose with a clue on the package. I would have to go to the Hinckley building, but I wasn't allowed to see. They blindfolded me, wrapped a coat around my shoulders, and lead me outside, down the stairs, across the snowy parking lot, and stuffed me into their car. The drive to the Hinckley is maybe 2 1/2 minutes, but it took us at least 6 to get there. (Vinnie is a very discreet man, even when I know where the location is.) Vinnie and Fingers talked nonchalantly the whole way. When we got out, Fingers was sent to find the informant and bring her to the meeting place where Vinnie and I would be waiting. 

It took a while for the informant to get to the statue we were to meet at, but when she did, she gave me the last clue: a box of perfume with the last clue on it. I took the blindfold off and grasped the clue.

"You should be able to find your way from here," she said, and she walked off around a corner.

I left the building promptly. The clue said he'd be in the gardens wearing black. No one was to be seen, except a young couple and their photographer. I searched over the gardens and finally saw a stone gazebo. I rounded the gazebo and there he was, in black as promised - the culprit! I walked into the gazebo.

"The gig is up, Watkins."

But was it? He had a new way of wriggling out of trouble, as always. He reached in his pocket - I reached toward my stiletto just in case - and pulled out a box. He dropped to one knee and opened the box.

 

Epilogue:

We went out to dinner at a place called Sandpiper in Idaho Falls. It was amazing! After that he took me to the Jim Brickman concert at the civic auditorium. (For those of you who don't know, Jim Brickman is a huge romantic piano soloist.) It was so much fun! Although I think I may have failed my mission - oh well. That's where wining and dining will get ya!

 

Girl's Night: Conner Style

"Ang, I have a proposition to make."

"Shoot."

"Saturday: you, me, the roomies, Aileen, Martinelli's, junk food, Miss America Pageant."

"Uhhh, yeah.  Let's do it!"

Okay, beauty pageants have been a Conner Women tradition since Mum had daughters old enough to enjoy critiquing, which surprisingly enough was when Alexa and I were at very young ages.  Every time a big one came up, we'd schedule a Girl's Night and reserve the living room.  There's quite a few actually: Miss Teen USA, Miss USA, Miss America, Miss Universe, and Miss World.  I think there's even a Mrs. America/USA (not sure which). We focused mainly on Miss America, Miss USA, and Miss Universe.  I've seen a couple of the others.  

Sadly, when Dad took us out to Saipan (yes, DAD; it would be a boy that took us away from our beloved Girl's Nights) the parents decided against getting television.  It's really not the worst thing in the world, but there a few things that I would really like to watch - pageants being a few of them.  So the Girl's Nights pretty much ended.  Yeah, once in a while we'd rent a movie when the guys were out or Dad was on a business trip, but that stopped too after Mum gave up her addiction to ice.  (That's a story for another time, folks.) 

I haven't seen a pageant since I've been back in the States.  For a couple of years they were doing all sorts of weird stuff to try and get their ratings back up.  One year they even did a FearFactor version, which was just totally against everything these pageants stand for. 

Pageants stand for something? you may ask.  Oh yes.  The point of all beauty pageants has been to inspire women to not only be beautiful on the outside, but also strive to achieve great things and become great women on the inside.  The stereotypical beauty has no brains, and these pageants are out to prove otherwise.  The winners and runners-up all receive considerable scholarships. 

Although this is a worthy cause, the pageants were getting a little out of hand.  They were losing ratings steadily, and it was because the style of everyday women had changed since the original airing in 1921.  (Ya think?!)  But the women were still doing the big-hair-big-make-u-dress-up-for-every-activity-even-if-it-was-a-marathon thing.  This year they passed it into the hands of TLC - a daughter channel of the Discovery Channel.  They aired the pilot of "Miss America: Reality Check" four weeks before the pageant.  The reality show put the 52 contestants into a house together and divided them into teams.  I really liked this because it brought the women closer together than ever before.  Even though they lived in the same hotel for the week of the pageant, they had always been there to compete, not to make friends.  The friendship was apparent among the ladies throughout the entire pageant, particularly when Miss Utah dropped to the ground and gave about 10 pushups after been eliminated from the top 16, and about seven other girls followed suit.  (The crowed was going wild.)  

I only saw the pilot of the reality show, but the gist of it was to revamp Miss America.  The message they wanted to send was, "Any girl can look beautiful no matter what she's doing, including real-life things."  The message they were sending was, "Any girl can look beautiful no matter what she's doing as long as it can be done in heels and hairspray."  They brought beauticians and hairdressers to teach the girls how to say "NO!" to aerosols and dangly earrings when the activity was a relay race (and yes, there were a number of girls who actually needed to be told so).  They brought on Stacy and Clinton from What Not to Wear (LOVE THAT SHOW! too bad I have a life) to teach the girls that their sparkly cow-girl boots were something to wear at home, not on stage.  

Another thing they did different this year was have 16 semi-finalists rather than 15.  The last one was voted on by Americans over the previous four weeks online rather than by the judges. The winner was Jill Stevens, Miss Utah.  Seriously, this girl was AMAZING! I mean, the 10 finalists were really cute and talented and smart, but NO ONE was as spunky as Miss Utah.  I am certain she won Miss Congeniality.  When she was called off I thought the crowd might rush the stage.  

Over all, I liked the new version.  I was a little disappointed that Kirsten Haglund, Miss Michigan won.  I mean, she was okay, but definitely not the best one out there.  In fact, after Miss Utah was voted off, I was all about the girl that got runner-up, but I can't think of who she is, or where she's from.  Oh well.  

Oh yeah!  I almost forgot the best part!  As they were crowning Miss Michigan, and she was freaking out and all, it was very obvious that there was bright red lipstick on her tooth and up her face quite a bit.  Angela, Jenni, and I were laughing so hard!  That would suck!  I mean, that's on camera and everything for the REST OF HER LIFE!  Hahaha!  The thing is, no one told her, not even the guy who walked right up to her face and gave her the flowers and a kiss.  No!  It wasn't until she got back from her little walk and the other ladies came up to congratulate her than one of the girls finally wiped it off for her.  Man, her face after she realized what she'd done was almost better than seeing her do it!

Confessions of a Maine Girl

Okay, I admit it - I'm addicted to Fluff.  Quite frankly, I don't really see that as being a problem, besides the slight chance I come down with a nasty case of diabetes.  (Okay, treating it with such lightness probably isn't as okay as I would like it to be, but I still think the sarcasm is funny.)  

So I brought some back from Maine with me.  (I make it a point to get some Fluff and maple syrup every time I'm back there.  Believe it or not, I'm pretty sure pure syrup is cheaper in Maine than it is in Idaho.)  I make Fluffanutters for my roommates sometimes, especially when I have a big container.  I just got a small one, so I keep it mostly as a hot chocolate topping.  It wasn't too difficult to convert Mike over to the fact that this is possibly the best way to enjoy both hot chocolate and Fluff anyway.  Except maybe...

Okay, this is where my addiction really makes itself clear.  I love to eat Fluff straight out of the jar.  It's just like eating marshmallows - which is a common ocurrance when living with one MariLou Conner - but it's smoother and creamier.  It's like the inside of a toasted marshmallow after you take the golden skin off - all gooey and tasty.  I used to sneak into the kitchen, quietly snap the lid off and grab a spoon.  (Let's make that clear, a spoon.  Not a shallow, pathetic little knife, a deep, wide spoon.)  I'd take a great big scoop, snap the lid back on, and slip the container back into position.  Then I'd sit back and enjoy the treat.  

I'm sure most people have done this, but have we ever thought about the complete untraceableness of it all?  I never would have open a container of peanut butter and do this. (a) I never understood why people were so addicted to eating it out of the jar anyway, and (b) It's always obvious that it's been eaten out of.  Fluff on the other hand, not being a true liquid, solid, or gas, is completely untraceable.  It just expands until it's once again smooth and perfect on top.  

There you have it everyone.  My confession of the perfect crime.

Get This!

So my grammar class is one of the funniest, most interesting classes I've ever taken.  Yeah, there are lots of boring parts, like diagraming, but I just ignore those aspects of it.  Anyway, we had a class on phonetics on Tuesday - which come to find out has always been one of my favorite topics, and I didn't even know it!  Bro. Hunt was going through the anatomy of the throat and mouth.  I thought it was really cool, and it made me a little giddy or hyper or whatever you want to call it.  Either way, I was probably having way too much fun in the class for me to be considered normal, even for an English major.  

Bro. Hunt said, "Let's all make the B-flat sound."  A girl near the piano hit a B-flat and we all om-ed together.  "The B-flat," he continued, "is the most commonly occurring sound in nature.  That is why Buddhists make that noise when they meditate."  I thought for a second, and being the somewhat corny wise-crack I can be sometimes, I said, "So the world really does want to B-flat."  

C'mon, you know it funny, and I do too, but I did not expect to get the reaction out of the class that I did.  Bro. Hunt gave a good chuckle and my friends who sit around me, but the rest of the class just erupted in laughter.  In fact, it made such an impression that on Wednesday I was in Craigo's, not working, but waiting to talk to someone, and a customer on her way out stopped and said, "Aren't you in my grammar class?"  I looked at her and said, "Sure," as I shrugged.  "You made the joke about B-flat, right?"  I smiled. "Oh yeah.  I guess I am."  She laughed again.  "I told that joke to my mom," and she made a gesture to one of the women that was with her.  

Wow.  I'm even funnier than I realized!

Halloween - FUPA Fighters!

Mike calls a person with a lot around the middle a FUPA Fighter.  FUPA stands for Fat Upper Pelvic Area.  I know, I know... it's weird.  So we decided to go as FUPA Fighters Bill and Barb Schwartzky.  (Those are our alias' we use on a regular basis, but now they have faces!)

Here are some pictures just in case you were wondering how they turned out.

Mike and me at his grandparents' house in Utah.

Barb and Bill at Comic Frenzy for Halloween.

Rhyme and Rhythm

So, I just got the email inviting me to read my poem Rhyme and Rhythm at the Pre-Professional conference coming up next week.  I submitted Rhyme and Rhythm along with two other poems, Insomnia (which is on here somewhere) and Psalm of Resolve - which I wrote in seminary years ago.  Rhyme and Rhythm was written in high school for a class.  I had to create an anthology of 30 poems - ten from the text, ten from outside sources, and ten of my own.  

Rhyme and Rhythm

Poetry from the heart

doesn't have to rhyme.

All it needs is an easy flow,

a little Rhythm to push it along.

But if you're uncomfortable 

With a free-verse ditty,

You can put in a word

To make it quite Witty.

Then again I know some people

who prefer not to rhyme.

They like the beat-nick Feel,

like the pound of a drum.

But others, I know,

Would like it much better

If the poem could Rhyme

With a word or a letter.

-February 5, 2003

Wish me luck!

Acoustic Cafe

This is my roommate Celeste and a good friend of mine, Trevor, performing at Acoustic Cafe here on campus. They're talking about maybe doing a Beetles song for Acoustic Cafe 2. They both have great voices, and they're lucky enough to sound exceptionally good together as well. I don't know if all of you know this song, but it was really popular in I think the early 90's. Well, actually, it's still really popular, but that's about when it came out.

Oh, I should warn you, it can be a little hard to watch. It was just filmed on Mike's little camera and his arms were getting tired of holding it up. So the pixels are pretty defined and it's a little shakey. (This is mostly for Dad's benefit. I know how he hates shakey home videos unless he filmed them himself.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLYy3j0vES8

"Linger" by The Cranberries

If you, if you could return
Don't let it burn, don't let it fade
I'm sure I'm not being rude
But it's just your attitude
It's tearing me apart
It's ruining everything
And I swore, I swore I would be true
And honey so did you
So why were you holding her hand
Is that the way we stand
Were you lying all the time
Was it just a game to you

Chorus
But I'm in so deep
You know I'm such a fool for you
You got me wrapped around your finger
Do you have to let it linger?
Do you have to, do you have to
Do you have to let it linger?

Oh, I thought the world of you
I thought nothing could go wrong
But I was wrong
I was wrong
If you, if you could get by
Trying not to lie
Things wouldn't be so confused
And I wouldn't feel so used
But you always really knew
I just wanna be with you

Chorus Twice

You know I'm such a fool for you
You got me wrapped around your finger
Do you have to let it linger?
Do you have to, do you have to
Do you have to let it linger?

"Waterfall"

Wow, it's been a while. School has really been taking it out of me! I haven't written in either of my journals for about a month probably. Don't worry. I'm back... at least for now!

So, I told Mum this story and she suggested I put it on here. So, yeah...

A couple of weeks ago I was sitting in the library studying my brain dry. Finally I decided that I was tired of alternating my stare between my books and the computer screen. I was hungry - it was about 7 and I had been there since right after Devotional, which got out a little before 3 - and my eyes were drying out. I closed my book, grabbed my wallet out of my backpack and left my studying supplies behind me as I took long, striding steps out of the library. Books, I love you, but there comes a time when I simply must do something.

I went to the Manwaring Center and stood at the counter of JoLynn's to get a bagel. I took it upstairs and ate it in the lounging areas of the MC. I stared at the pianos, wanting to play, but knowing that once I did, studying was pretty much done for the night. Eventually I decided that I had studied enough, and it was time to play. I walked over to the closest piano, passing a friend of mine from Russian. We said hi and had our pleasantries, and I left him to his studying. I sat down at the piano, stretched my fingers, and started to play "Jessica's Theme" from The Man from Snowy River. It was a good warm up, and after a couple of other songs I started the light tinkling beginning of "Waterfall" by John Schmidt. The song is very intense, and is a favorite among Latter-Day Saints. I usually save it for last 'cause it hurts my forearms.

As I came to the climax, a man walked up stairs and came to stand over by the piano, a little off to the side. I saw him, but he wasn't so close that he was distracting - that's just annoying. I hit the impressive G Major and lay my hands to rest. The man walked over and greeted me.

"Very good!"
"Thank you," I replied a little embarrassed.
"You know, that was my daughter's theme song. We could all tell when she was trying to release a little frustration because the house would shake with her playing. She's in college now. I was just walking out when I heard this song playing and had to come up and meet the pianist. I'm Elder Hammond of the Seventy." He offered his hand.
"Oh! I'm Mallory," I said, taking it. "Thank you very much. It's always nice to know someone appreciates my playing." He thanked me again, and turned to leave. Another man, a student, had followed him up the stairs and was respectfully waiting his turn to thank me as well, but got slightly distracted for a few minutes by the surprise of the Seventy. He ran up to him and offered his name and hand. He then turned to me and thanked me.

It's a cute little story. So there you have it.

Mal's Moments of Madness

So, I've finally started going back to the gym. Good grief, it's taken me long enough! I was amazing at it last Fall, I went at least three times a week with Angela. Then I went to Saipan for Christmas, and when I got back in January, I was down to three times a semester, and the occasional game of basketball. I've been meaning to get back, but it wasn't until last Sunday, when I showed them this ad in a magazine of mine.



"By the end of Fall semester, guys. Fall semester." Kenneth and Anton scoffed, as did Amber and Jamie, but Kyle said,
"Hey, if you can do that by the end of Fall, I'll do handstand push-ups. Those can be our goals."

Typical Kyle answer to something like that. I'm pretty sure he really thinks I can do anything. I mean, I'm fairly certain that I can actually do this - whether or not it's on a Pyrex 2-cup measure, we'll see when the time comes.


The following Monday I thought to myself, it's been a while since I've even attempted a handstand. I guess I should start out with that. Yeah... after four or five tries I finally got my legs up high enough and straight enough, and tight enough so that I was actually in a real handstand. It lasted for about 3 seconds.


This may be a little harder than I thought.


I've been doing handstands in my room every day since. I'm still not holding them much longer than 7 seconds. Not to mention in order to do the pose above I'm going to have to move slowly, which means there going to be some major expectations on just my upper-body strength alone. In all reality, I'll probably have to start in something like a headstand and push up into a handstand from there. (You can mount headstands slower, that's the perk. Con: I've tried it before, even back when I was a gymnast. If I can pull it off, I'll be the next Xena.) However I do it, it'll take some real figuring out and a whole lot of strength.


Anyway, so I decided that the best thing to do would be to start going back to the gym and doing some real workouts, not any of this dilly-dallying I've been doing since January. My arms, shoulders, and back are so sore. I've been running the track too. It'd be kind of nice to get my mile back down to 6 minutes, and I figured I might as well work on that while I'm being rediculous anyways. We can just clump it all in together in what I like to call, "The Fall of Amazing Feats."


Wish me luck.

Tuck's Pups?

Since I've lived with Melissa L. back in Maine in '05, I've wanted to own my own dog. Even if it was just a little one like hers. Unfortunately you can't own one in any BYU-I approved housing.

Today I was heading towards the mailboxes when I noticed this little guy walking around near the back building. At first I thouhgt it was a cat, which I wouldn't have been so worried about. (I like cats and all, but they seem more able to live on their own as strays that pups are, so I worry about them less. Besides, they almost seem to like it.) When I got closer I realized it was a puppy. Not just any puppy though, it was a black lab/hound mix. Labs have a special place in my heart. First of all, they're the cutest. Don't try to argue, lovers of other breeds. There's not chance you'll change my mind. But also, the first dog my family ever owned (that I can remember) was Tucker, a little black lab mutt, whose pure-bred mum got out and so the pups were too tarnished to sell for a high price. Tuck was the sweetest dog you'd have ever met!

I called to the pup, and he toddled on up to me, all friendly. Then Kim came out and ran after another that was headed into the parking lot.

"Are these yours?" I asked.

"No, they're my friend's." Out came another girl and explained that she volunteered at the shelter, and took the triplets out for the morning to play around. She said there was a little girl over by Kim's front door. I had to get some pictures! The boys had marking just like Tuck's, especially Bo.

Top: That's Bo, just hanging out. He was the calmest, but they were all sweet.

Right: I know it looks like I'm modeling, but really I'm just trying to focus on holding Bo right so that you can see his white.

Left: I've got JoLee, that's the girl, Kim's got Rascal, and Bo's just getting up. You can really see the hound in their ears, but they've got big, but the lab comes through in their eyes and their big webbed paws and smooth coats. JoLee had kind of coarse fur, but the boys had beautiful coats.

A Working Wonder

For those of you who don't know, I serve tables for work. I like to serve, actually, I like pretty much anything there is to do in a restaurant... almost anything at least. Serving is fun 'cause I get to do things for people. I like knowing people can rely on me, and with serving, they have no choice, even if I'm tired or just sucky! Haha! It's awesome!

Anyway, so I was serving, and had quite a few tables; it was busy, but not crazy - that's a good thing. When I get into a nice groove where the pace is perfect and everything is just working out beautifully, I can't help but be extra smiley. This wasn't one of those nights, but it wasn't bad. I was having fun, but I did have a couple of anxious tables.

I saw this couple, probably in their 40's, waiting at the pasta bar for a chef to come help them. (It doesn't have to be a chef, anyone can do it, and everyone knows how.) I saw them standing there for quite some time and as I walked by with some dishes, I promised I'd be back in a moment to help them. A second later I was there getting their pastas. The next time I went to my section I saw them at one of my tables. I didn't know anyone had been seated there. I felt bad. Sometimes when things start to get busy, the hostess will seat them and tell them to get started if they are getting the buffet and then forget to let the server know. (The server will find out anyway 'cause she's running to her section all the time, but the hostess will let us know if she has the time.) I thought that perhaps they had been there a long time and just got tired of waiting. I had a table right next to them that was fairly needy - which, by the way, is really annoying. If the server asks if they can get anything for you, let them know EVERYTHING you can think of all at once so that they can just get it in one foul swoop and stop running back and forth. That just wastes their time! *Heaving a sigh*

Anyway, I gave this table as much attention as I could, and it actually turned out to be just fine. The needy table left and so I could get the other tables everything they needed and wanted without delay. I must have turned out to be pretty good, 'cause the man from that couple left me a 30% tip and wrote on the bill, "You had shiny eyes!" Sweetest thing I've heard all summer. Course, the money doesn't hurt.

PARTY ON THE WEST COAST!

So, my roommate, Takara, was hurrying out the door to leave for Oregon. She had invited our other roommate Amber to go with her since she's from a little town in Oregon. Unfortunately she had to work, so it was looking like it would be just Takara until she got to Pocatello and met up with her friend and cousin. I was walking out with her, since I was going out to do something of no particular importance and she said, "Hey, why don't YOU come with me?!" I was like, "Yeah, sure. I'll find someone else to sing in church on Sunday, and call in a couple people to take my two shifts for the next couple days at work." She was all for it. In a couple of minutes, I had called the bishop for the service ward, the pianist, and the man I'm singing the duet with to reschedule for next Sunday; I had called the hostess at Craigo's and arranged for Dani to fill in for me both Friday and Saturday night (she was looking to pick up some shifts anyway); and had my bags packed, in the trunk, and was on my way to Pocatello to pick up these girls.














Hey, I've never been to the west coast.





We arrived at Takara's uncle's house in Portland around 5:30 Friday morning. We cleaned ourselves up a bit and headed out to breakfast with 'Uncle Louie.' When we got back a couple of us took a nap while the others went out and gallivanted. Then we all got back together and went shopping - a find of some ADORABLE red stilettos took me out $60, and from there I went drastically downhill. Really though, I didn't do as badly as I thought I had once I went through how much I spent. You see, there's really no place to get some good shopping done anywhere near Rexburg. Not even Idaho Falls. This was my one chance for any quality clothing for the next 6 months at least.

Besides, I've never been to the west coast.

We spent the night at Uncle Louie's - funny story by the way. He was having a hard time remembering my name, so he told the girls while they were sitting outside one of the stores waiting for me to finish up that I needed a nickname. He settled on Moe. Later Takara told me about it and I was like, "No kidding! That's been my nickname among my family since my cousin started calling me Malie-Moses when I was like 7." We thought that was pretty ironic.


Anyway, Saturday was spent at the street bazaar in downtown Portland. It was here that Takara figured out why everyone from Oregon is so freaking happy: the entire city of Portland smells like marijuana. I'm pretty sure it's soaked into the buildings. Heaven forbid one of them catch fire. The street market was a lot of fun. I found the coolest art booth! I'll put the link to his website on here later. Takara and I got our portraits drawn - I will also put that picture on here, since I'm sure there'll be requests for it. The only other thing I bought were these really cool coins. They're just a Maine state quarter and a silver dollar from 1922. But the man has jigsawed all the negative space out of them. They are the coolest things! I'm sure I'll find something to do with them. I'll take pictures of them as well. After the street market we went to Multnomah Falls. It's beautiful!





Saturday night, Takara, her friend Emily, and I went to Salem and spent the night in a cheap hotel. We drove Sunday morning to Lincoln City on the coast. What a pretty little coast town, and what a pretty drive! I would never want to live in Portland, it's kind of a dirty city, but the coast is beautiful. It made me rather homesick for Maine. Really the only difference is that since Maine's coast is so rocky, and the water is very deep right up to the land, we have lots of harbors that are right up against the towns. Oregon's coast is sandy and so there aren't as many harbors and coves and such. It was so nice to have trees and mountains all right up close. (I'm still trying to figure out how I landed in the ONE TOWN that lands right in between the Rocky Mountains and the Tetons. There's no water or trees for miles, and my campus is on the highest point in the area! Good grief.)

Anyway, enjoy the first few pictures I've got here. Like I said, I've got lots more to come!

You're a 90's kid if:

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You can sing the rap to "The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air"
You remember when Kurt Cobain, Tu Pac, River Phoenix, and Selena died.
You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"
You remember when it was actually worth getting up earlyon a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
"Goosebumps" were the books to be reading.
You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, wax off"
You have pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You danced to "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls; Females: had a new motto, Males: got a whole lot gay-er. (so tell me what you want, what you really really want.)
You remember the craze, then the banning of slap bracelets and slam books.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...
Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.
Captain Planet. 'Nough said.
You remember when super nintendo's became popular - and you can beat every level on every game.
You remember watching home alone 1, 2 , and 3........and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
"I've fallen and I can't get up"
You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates
Two words... Trapper Keeper.
You never got injured on a Slip 'n' Slide
You wore socks over leggings scrunched down
You wore leggings with the strap that went under your foot.
"Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack, all dressed in black, black, black, with silver buttons, buttons, buttons, all down her back, back, back" SHE ASKED HER MOTHER MOTHER MOTHER FOR FIFTY CENTS CENTS CENTS TO SEE THE ELEPHANTS PHANTS PHANTS JUMP OVER THE FENCE THE FENCE THE FENCE he jumped so high high high he touched the sky sky sky and he didnt come back back back til the forth of july ly ly he jumped so low ow ow he stubbed his toe toe toe and thats the end end end of the elephants show show show
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
You remember New Kids on The Block when they were cool
You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere
You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles
NANCY DREW AND THE HARDY BOYS WERE THE BEST MYSTERY BOOKSY
Ikes pencils and erasers were the stuff!
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand. (pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)
You remember when the new Beanie Babies were always sold out.
You used to wear those stick on earings, not only on your ears, but at the corners of your eyes.
You remember a time before the WB.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand"
You thought Brain woud finally take over the world
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
You remember when everyone went slinky crazy.
You remember when razor scooters were cool.

When we were younger:
Before the MySpace.com frenzy...
Before the Internet & text messaging...
Before Sidekicks & iPods...
Before MIKE JONES...
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX......
Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs & paid $3.50 for a movie.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.
When 2Pac and Biggie where alive.
When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.

Way back.
Tag.
Get Over Here!!!! means something to you.
Hide-n-Go Seek at dusk.
Red Light, Green Light.
Heads Up 7 Up.
Playing Kickball & Dodgeball until your porch light came on.
Hopskotch.
Slip-n-Slides.
Tree Houses.
Hula Hoops.
HELLO....HOT WHEELS!!!!!
"POWER OF LOVE" BY CELINE DION. ONLY COUPLES COULD SKATE TO THIS.
The annoying Giga Pets & Furbies.
Running through the sprinklers.
The "Little Mermaid"
Crying when Mufasa died in the Lion King.
Happy Meals where you chose a Barbie or a Hot Wheels car.
Getting the privelage to sit in the front seat of the car.
Drinking Sqeeze It "Squeeze The Fun Out Of It"
CAPRI SUN
Watching Saturday Morning Cartoons in your PJ's still wrapped up in your TMNT, Power Rangers, Barbie, or Fairy Princess comforter.
The original Power Rangers

Or what about:
Hey Arnold.
Rugrats.
Ren & Stimpy.
Rocco's Modern Life.
AAAHH!! REAL MONSTERS.
Wild & Crazy Kids.
Clarissa Explains it All.
CAMP NOWHERE - Salute Your Shorts (CAMP ANAWANA)
Are You Afraid of the Dark?
The original cast members of All That.
Kenan & Kel.
"CITY GUYS"...ROLLW/ THE CITY GUYS
Doug.
Magic School Bus.
Flash Forward.
Hey Dude.
Dinosaurs.
Alladin.
Mummies Alive!
Pinky and the Brain.
Gargoyles.
Sailor Moon.
Blossom.
Hangin with Mr. Cooper.
Beavis & ButtHead
Wishbone.
Bill Nye the Science Guy
MR RODGERS!!!!

Who could forget:
Snick? & Nick @ Nite with Bewitched, I Dream of Jenie, The Facts of Life, I Love Lucy, TGIF, and Happy Days. (Sunday, Monday, Happy Days!)
Where everyone wanted to be in love after watching The Wonder Years.
Kool-Aid was the drink of choice.
Kids under 16 were too busy climbing trees to have cell phones.
When $5 seemed like a million, & another dollar a miracle.
When you begged to go to McDonalds for dinner everyday.
When Toys R Us overuled the mall.

Go back to the time when:
Decisions were made by going 'eeny-meeny-miney-moe'.
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming 'do over!
''Race issue' ment arguing about who ran the fastest.
Money issues were handled by whoever was banker in 'Monopoly.'
It wasn't odd to have two or three 'best' friends.
Being old referred to anyone over 20.
A chance to skate as a couple at the local roller rink was like winning the lottery.
Scrapes & bruises were kissed & made better.
It was a big deal to finally be tall enough to ride the 'big people' rides at the fair.
When Ninja Turtles ruled the world.
Another Baby Sitter Club and Little Sister (Karen) book came out and you put your name on hold for it at the library.
When Aladdin was new, before the trilogy was complete.
Sockem Boppers
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!!!!

From the group "You grew up in the 90's if you remember this" on Facebook.com.

Read This to Your Boys!!

Okay, so, last May there was a prance (prom/dance) held in the Saipan Branch cultural hall. Let me tell you the story real quick and I'll get on to why it's a little annoying to me.

So, the youth wanted an LDS-standards formal dance; so they set up a prom committee. They were not using Church funds, which meant the kids would have to buy the tickets themselves in order to pay for the dance. They reserved a room in one of the hotels, and started making plans. Tickets cost somewhere around $25. (I know. It's ridiculously cheap. In fact, thinking about the rest of the story makes me almost sick because of the cheapness of these tickets. Couple's tickets for my senior prom were $60.) Boys started picking out girls, and far more importantly girls started picking out dresses.

A few months into this whole affair, and they almost had to cancel it all. The tickets weren't selling. TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS and they weren't selling! You can make that much in a day, without a steady job, even in Saipan. The committee quickly decided that the only way to save the dance was to move it to the cultural hall in the church building. Not the most elegant of places, but they could spruce it up. The boys confirmed their dates and the dance turned out to be a success.

So here's what gets to me: the utter tackiness and lack of appreciation boys EVERYWHERE show for the girls they seem so keen on dating. Do these guys realize how much an event like this costs for a girl, or do they really just not care enough to spend a little cash? My gown was right around $100, and I still had to get it altered. I didn't even buy the shoes I really wanted 'cause they were another $60, so I just settled on a black, rinestone-encrusted pair of highheels from Payless for about $25. There's jewlery, which they have to buy to match the dress, which I've heard of going anywhere from $15-$90 for a prom. Then there's the hair, which takes time and for most girls, another $20-$40. If they also have their makeup done for them, which probably about half of the girls in the world do for prom and other very formal events, that's another $20-$60. That brings the total to between $160 (saying they get the cheap shoes) and $290, if they do their own makeup.

Renting a tux can cost anywhere from $45 to $90. But boys in high school - nix that, boys in general - are obviously not too concerned with how nice the tuxedo is, and will get the cheapest one they can find, unless they can get by in a nice suit and tie. They cough up $15-$30 for a corsage and call it an evening! So, they spend AT MOST for a prom, including a $60 ticket (which is a little high for a lot of schools), $180. That's at the very most.

This isn't even all of it. I have had boys come to pick me up for a date in Burmuda shorts and a questionably clean tee-shirt. If we were very close friends I would accept something like this for a picnic on the beach, or a hike or a bonfire. (Actually, no, the tee shirt would definitely have to be clean for any of these.) These were guys trying to make first impressions, or trying to plan something really romantic. Men have escorted me to dances or church in wrinkled khakis, or poorly knotted ties. What is it with guys?! If I ever bring it up, his excuse is, "Well, I'm paying for the date." (Guys, this line is so tacky and rude that after saying it you can be pretty sure you will never date that girl again.) Or if it's free, it's something like, "It doesn't really matter. It's not a formal thing." Excuse me, but if you're going anywhere alone it should at least matter, but if you're going to be with me, or anyone else that has put any effort AT ALL into their attire, the least you can do is think it out a little. I'm not saying you should be entirely wrapped up in vainity, but just have the courtesy of putting a little thought into it.

And no, being a friend I date regularly or my boyfriend, or even my husband does not mean you can start dressing shabby on our dates. I dress nicely 'cause I want people to be able to look at us and think, "Man, that guy is lucky! Look at the chic on his arm!" (Whether anyone actually thinks that or not in my case is irrelavent.) Why can't the guy have enough courtesy to dress well enough for the girls around us to think, "Mmm-hmm! Look at that FINE piece of eye-candy! That girl knows how to pick her accessories!"

Anyway, that's my pet peeve for now. I hope you read this boys, so it'll start to sink in. I know the majority or you think that you are perhaps too old to save, but I have faith in anyone under the age of 50. Mothers, get your boys started young.

Pictures from the Saipan Prance can be found on my mum's blog. www.thethinks.blogspot.com.

Fireworks and Waterballoons!

So for the Fourth of July a bunch of us went up to R mountain. (I've seen good fireworks from mountains before, but R mountain is so far away that it doesn't really give you the effect you're looking for. I wont make the same mistake next year.) Anyway, so, we went up there, and watched some of the firework shows put on by different towns and counties. You could kind of see Idaho Falls' from where we were, but it would've been better had we been farther up. You just have to keep in mind it was pretty dark and there's not really too much of a path in lots and lots of places, so we decided to stay where we were. We shot some fireworks off ourselves on the tiny plateau we were on. Not the most brilliant idea, but they weren't anything big, so nothing happened ... at least nothing we started. There was a fire down below us that some other hoodlums started. Foolish kids. What kind of an idiot doesn't realize that fire around dry brush is dangerous?! Once we realized that they didn't quite have it under control, two boys rushed down to help and the rest helped us girls get off the top of the plateau. By the time we got down there our boys had it pretty well contained. The other kids had climbed up away from the fire and called the fire department. One of our guys looked at them and was like, "well, is that all you're going to do?" He rushed in and started pulling the branches away from one another and away from other bushes. (Two had lit.) As we drove away, we saw the trucks rush past us. Stupid kids.



The rest of the pictures are from out ward's closing social! We had a catered Dutch oven barbeque - it was soooo good - and a huge waterballoon fight, including Bishop Walker and Brother Wright (the first counselor). Afterwards there was a big game of ultimate frisbee. (It's a fun game, but quite frankly, people have become obsessed.) We also had kickballs, a soccerball, a baseball and some gloves, a hose, a football, and a tug-of-war rope just in case anyone was interested. Most were used, but the others were there just in case anyone wanted to start something.



We had hundreds and hundreds of waterballoons. They came in packs of 250 I think, and we had like, 6 packs. We had three or four bins filled with them. They were really heavy. Plus, there was a hose was involved. The kid in the white shirt is Jon, and the girl in the blue shirt all hunched over happens to be me trying to defend myself. Don't worry, I got him back.

Here's a good picture of the fray. It was crazy! Everyone was in on it here, until we ran out of balloons. Then those of us who knew where the last bin was, ran to the other end of the field and got in a big fight there too. That's when Bishop and Bro. Wright joined in. It was pretty fun. I was the first to throw at Bishop, but it didn't pop.

That was frustrating!