Saturday, July 14, 2007

Read This to Your Boys!!

Okay, so, last May there was a prance (prom/dance) held in the Saipan Branch cultural hall. Let me tell you the story real quick and I'll get on to why it's a little annoying to me.

So, the youth wanted an LDS-standards formal dance; so they set up a prom committee. They were not using Church funds, which meant the kids would have to buy the tickets themselves in order to pay for the dance. They reserved a room in one of the hotels, and started making plans. Tickets cost somewhere around $25. (I know. It's ridiculously cheap. In fact, thinking about the rest of the story makes me almost sick because of the cheapness of these tickets. Couple's tickets for my senior prom were $60.) Boys started picking out girls, and far more importantly girls started picking out dresses.

A few months into this whole affair, and they almost had to cancel it all. The tickets weren't selling. TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS and they weren't selling! You can make that much in a day, without a steady job, even in Saipan. The committee quickly decided that the only way to save the dance was to move it to the cultural hall in the church building. Not the most elegant of places, but they could spruce it up. The boys confirmed their dates and the dance turned out to be a success.

So here's what gets to me: the utter tackiness and lack of appreciation boys EVERYWHERE show for the girls they seem so keen on dating. Do these guys realize how much an event like this costs for a girl, or do they really just not care enough to spend a little cash? My gown was right around $100, and I still had to get it altered. I didn't even buy the shoes I really wanted 'cause they were another $60, so I just settled on a black, rinestone-encrusted pair of highheels from Payless for about $25. There's jewlery, which they have to buy to match the dress, which I've heard of going anywhere from $15-$90 for a prom. Then there's the hair, which takes time and for most girls, another $20-$40. If they also have their makeup done for them, which probably about half of the girls in the world do for prom and other very formal events, that's another $20-$60. That brings the total to between $160 (saying they get the cheap shoes) and $290, if they do their own makeup.

Renting a tux can cost anywhere from $45 to $90. But boys in high school - nix that, boys in general - are obviously not too concerned with how nice the tuxedo is, and will get the cheapest one they can find, unless they can get by in a nice suit and tie. They cough up $15-$30 for a corsage and call it an evening! So, they spend AT MOST for a prom, including a $60 ticket (which is a little high for a lot of schools), $180. That's at the very most.

This isn't even all of it. I have had boys come to pick me up for a date in Burmuda shorts and a questionably clean tee-shirt. If we were very close friends I would accept something like this for a picnic on the beach, or a hike or a bonfire. (Actually, no, the tee shirt would definitely have to be clean for any of these.) These were guys trying to make first impressions, or trying to plan something really romantic. Men have escorted me to dances or church in wrinkled khakis, or poorly knotted ties. What is it with guys?! If I ever bring it up, his excuse is, "Well, I'm paying for the date." (Guys, this line is so tacky and rude that after saying it you can be pretty sure you will never date that girl again.) Or if it's free, it's something like, "It doesn't really matter. It's not a formal thing." Excuse me, but if you're going anywhere alone it should at least matter, but if you're going to be with me, or anyone else that has put any effort AT ALL into their attire, the least you can do is think it out a little. I'm not saying you should be entirely wrapped up in vainity, but just have the courtesy of putting a little thought into it.

And no, being a friend I date regularly or my boyfriend, or even my husband does not mean you can start dressing shabby on our dates. I dress nicely 'cause I want people to be able to look at us and think, "Man, that guy is lucky! Look at the chic on his arm!" (Whether anyone actually thinks that or not in my case is irrelavent.) Why can't the guy have enough courtesy to dress well enough for the girls around us to think, "Mmm-hmm! Look at that FINE piece of eye-candy! That girl knows how to pick her accessories!"

Anyway, that's my pet peeve for now. I hope you read this boys, so it'll start to sink in. I know the majority or you think that you are perhaps too old to save, but I have faith in anyone under the age of 50. Mothers, get your boys started young.

Pictures from the Saipan Prance can be found on my mum's blog.

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